Building Character and Integrity with Chores

Oh, boy! Our kids must hate us. The words came out of my mouth at the beginning of the year. “Hey kids, we’re going to start doing chores and paying you for the chores.” Yeah, Mom and Dad, thanks.

            Actually, our kids have been very agreeable about doing the chores. In the past, we have done chores, but we have done them inconsistently. This year, we have decided that we need to be much more intentional about the chores. We set up the plan that we would have the kids do chores and get paid weekly for those chores. Once a month, they will be able to change chores. Also, we all agree to the chores. Our kids have a say in what chores they will choose for the month, subject to parental approval.

            We also have set up a understandable payment schedule. The kids have five chores a week. Some of the chores are once a week tasks and some are daily tasks. But, they have to do the chores in order to get paid. We have five chores, and the kids can earn up to $5 a week if they complete all of their chores. And we have already had weeks in which one or both of the kids did not want to complete a chore. Guess what? They did not get paid for neglecting that chore. It seems to be working. 

            We have clearly established where their money is going. Each week, they can earn $1 for giving away, $2 for spending, and $2 for saving for a bigger purchase. We developed this system after I read Dave Ramsey and Rachel Cruze’s book Smart Money, Smart Kids. They write that this is the way chores were paid for in their household. Since our kids are 7- and 5-years-old, we don’t have them saving for a car or college. It’s too long term, and we want them to learn basic money concepts at this age. And when  the kids do not complete their chores, we take away money first from their "spend" money. Yep, that’s right. We take away their immediate spending money. The first dollar they receive, and the last dollar they will lose, is their “giving away” money. We think it is important that our children learn that giving is an important value.

            Our kids have for the most part, enjoyed and been eager to do their chores. It is incredible to see how they grow as they are given responsibility. The chores have given us some teachable moments as well, since we are able to talk about the value of working hard or that we must have integrity as we do our jobs to the best of our abilities (and don't say we have done something that we didn't actually do). They really do take pride in doing things and being an integral, contributing member of the family.

            As time goes on, we will be able to have some more lessons. For example, we already see that our kids use their “spend” money on frivolous purchases. Our son gets his two dollars, and immediately spends it on games for his tablet. They tend to spend money on cheap stuff that breaks easily. I get to talk about how some purchases are not the best decisions. Over time, I hope that we will get lessons about taking time and researching before we make a purchase. For now, we allow some money to be wasted in order to teach this lesson.

            I am not perfect with this system. There are days when I have done the chore without giving the kids an opportunity to do it. It is easy for me to load or unload the dishwasher instead of waiting for the kids to do it. Also, I have been negligent about making a chore list for the kids to check off each week (which reminds me that  I need to make one for this week). We are all growing, and enjoying each other more, through this process.